I actually really enjoyed it, woke me up & made me snap out of my bad mood that I've been in all weekend.
I've been reflecting on my post yesterday & wondering if some of my frustration & feeling of being let down is from Matt rather than anyone else? I'm finding life tough & I'm expecting everyone to understand that. Why would they though? They are happy & don't have this overwhelming feeling of isolation that I have. I want people to get it, I guess walk in my shoes and feel what it's like. Deep down I know that unless they go through this (god forbid) they won't ever know though, it's a lonely path to travel.
I'm finding myself resentful of others, those that can do 'normal' things. If you separate from the father of your children then at least they are still there somewhat to help out, I don't have that, I'm doing it on my own & will be now forever. That's a hard pill to swallow, Groundhog Day for the next x amount of years *sigh*
I want to enjoy my children, look forward to spending my days with them not resent them. I need to snap out if this self pity 😞
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